An Evening with Eckhart Tolle

Here is a brief bit of what I took away from my evening with Eckhart Tolle:

We are bound for disappointment if we believe that any external thing will bring us happiness. Getting that perfect job, finding the perfect mate, having enough money, losing "x" amount of weight, owning our dream house, buying our dream car...these are all perfectly ok goals to have but by no means are the means to finding our true selves and obtaining happiness in this life.

We get so caught up in defining ourselves by our stories. That is, what we do, who we know, what we have, or what we can do and our minds are so cluttered with all of these thoughts about what we should be doing to get where we need to be that we cannot find ourselves even though we are right here all the time. These things are not who we are and they cannot possibly bring us the happiness we seek.

When we do actually achieve a goal, how often do we celebrate it and continually enjoy the happiness reaching it brings? Not long right? Just long enough for us to think "ok that's done... what's next?" Or worse yet, we are disappointed that reaching our goal didn't bring us the joy we thought it would. So we seek yet another "thing", outside ourselves, resuming our search for happiness. We do this because once we find "IT" we falsely believe we will then be able to relax and enjoy the rest of lives in a constant state of bliss.

There is no thing that will bring this feeling to us. The feeling is inside of us. In order to access it we must be still in our minds long enough to feel it. What a challenge this can be. The mind seems to be its own entity at times, completely controlling our every second with senseless and futile chatter. When we realize that we are not our mind and that it is simply a tool for us, like our hands or our feet, that is when we can start to understand and investigate who is behind the mind, controlling the mind...and what we find is something much deeper, Spirit. Or whatever Name you want to give it. There is something much greater that we have access to, that we are a piece of. And once we tap into who we are essentially that is when we start to feel it...true happiness, joy, peace and serenity, even in the midst of chaos.

So try it, you know those familiar words "Be still and know..." Try first by noticing the space between words or sentences...when there is seemingly nothing there. If you try long enough you will find there more than you could have ever imagined.

Cleanse, Play, Sweat

It is amazing to me how different I am from the person I was a decade ago, and yet how much closer I am to who I actually (am) or was as a child.

CLEANSE: Today is my 7th day on Stanley Burroughs Master Cleanser (http://www.mastercleanser.com)./ Over the past 5 years I have done this cleanse for a varied number of days, sometimes feeling successful and other times not. I entered into this cleanse with a whole different mindset than the other times I've done it. I am doing it for me this time, with my eyes wide open. It's not about "white knuckling" it to get it done and see how long I can go. This time it has been about using it as an opportunity to understand myself on a deeper level and clean out my body and mind of the junk that has accumulated in both. So far, I can honestly say that I have a new understanding of my relationship with food and what it means to me...

PLAY: Friday night I went down to 7th Street Cafe to watch a fellow yoga teacher and actor perform in Phaedre (a Greek Tragedy) put on by the Nearly Naked Theater. It was an amazing play and such an intimate setting (only about 50 people were able to be seated there). This was a "talk back" experience where the public is asked to join the director, writer and actors in the cafe after the play to discuss it. I didn't stay for the talk but it felt good to be a part of the experience...

On Saturday I went to the Dodge Theater in Phoenix to listen to Eckhart Tolle speak on The Power of Presence: Going Beyond Ego. It was also an amazing experience. Reading Tolle's first book "The Power of Now" changed my thinking about my thoughts and the ego. It was a very pivotal book for me. Right when I walked into the theater I could feel the energy vibration of the room rise a few levels, it was definitely palpable...

SWEAT: This morning I attended my second Native American Sweat Lodge. This is something that I have been wanting to do for a while now and finally got the opportunity to be a part of. It was an "east sweat" which is about developing your passion, vision and opening to enlightenment...

If you would have told me, a decade ago, that I would be doing these things over a weekend instead of partying and bathing myself in the self-centered and materialistic past-times; I doubt I would have cared to do any of it. Today I am so grateful for the shift in consciousness and the opportunity to get back to who I really am.

Hey Cat Lady

About four months ago 3 kittens showed up in our neighborhood...cute little things but skiddish... Then about 3-4 weeks later a big black and white tom cat and a little female cat showed up. Rumor is some lady moved and just let them all out.

Well I started looking on line for a rescue or an organization that could help us out with this problem. All the info I could find said to start feeding them to gain their trust so that they could be trapped. So I did. Little did I know that there were no rescue organizations that could take them. Or that Arizona is a "right to roam" state...meaning cats don't have to be tagged so the county will not help will capturing them. And that if I took them to the pound they would be euthanized right a way because they were not social. Meanwhile, the neighbors are all complaining about them and trying to blame someone but few are trying to find a solution. "Take them to the pound" is the best advice I could get from people... Well that is just not how I am wired. Some people can and that is who they are. I can't and that is me.

So I have done my best to keep the faith and move right along trying to find a solution. I called channel 3 news, channel 12 news, asked my vets office, even considered paying for each one to get fixed at my vets office so I could socialize them and find them homes. Oh by the way- did I mention that all the while the two pets that I have (indoor only) have started having behavioral problems because of all the cat calling and fighting outside the windows? Ya...

Anyway, I stumbled across AZ Cats which is a trap, neuter, return program. They hooked me up with a vets office that would fixed the cats for a "donation"and they provided me with 5 cat traps and all the info I needed to capture them. Today I set the traps and caught all 5 cats. They are in my garage waiting to see what happens next.

Thankfully, my neighbor has a friend who lives on a farm who has agreed to take the three kittens, what a blessing! The other two will come back here. Hopefully more mellow, without all those hormones flowing in their bodies. I will try to find homes for them.

This past four months has been trying for me and it surprised me how most people just wanted to tease me, calling me the "cat lady", and give me crap about caring so much. Some people talk all tough about how they would just take them to the pound or drop them off somewhere else if it were them ... but they don't actually think through what they are saying long enough to realize there is way more to it than they think...

Sadly, the truth is most people don't care. They turn a blind eye or pretend its not their problem, desperately trying to find someone to blame.

Well, this experience has given me a whole new respect for people who DO care and my hat is off to the men and women who spend their extra time trying to help catch up to this epidemic problem. Taking in stray animals, fixing them and finding homes for them is a time consuming and heartbreaking task... I give them credit for investing their time, money and emotion; and for not taking the "easy" way out. It takes a special type of person to volunteer to do this... I was sort of pushed into helping the ones I am trying to help, it was not by choice...I am talking about the people who can handle this on a regular basis. It truly is selfless and I am truly grateful for all they do.

And to the people who adopt pets and do not get them fixed, let them roam and breed, or feel it is ok to abandoned the responsibility they took on by just leaving it for someone else to deal with...

Karma is a funny thing.... Keep your fingers crossed you don't come back as a stray animal in your next life. And if you do....may you be lucky enough not to happen upon someone who feels like you do in this one.

Thank you to the people who offered support during this adventure, it was much appreciated!

Just Friends

Can men and woman truly just be friends? This is a very popular question, one society has been experimenting with and debating for ages...

What do we mean by "friends"? Of coarse we can be friendly and kind to all people if we choose to. But close friends? Who hang out together, go do things together, have long talks about significant things together...? It has been my experience that if you are compatible in that you enjoy spending time with another person doing all of these things, then even if there is no physical connection in the beginning, one will eventually develop from one or both sides of the relationship. I have found this is true even if a friendship is defined from the beginning, there is no physical attraction, or one or the other person is in another significant relationship. It may take a very long time to happen but it is human nature and even the most well intentioned people run the risk of losing a close friendship if they become too intimately connected as "friends".

Now what about the romantic relationship that ends and one or both people want to continue to be "friends"? I think this is a nice idea and one would think that we should be able to do this. But usually a relationship ends because at least one person is no longer interested the other person. So, could this "friendship" idea really be just a one sided ego boost?
Again I think the definition of the word friend applies here too. And as I eluded to before, men and women are not designed to stifle the energetic draw between them, the pull of yin and yang if you will. That is why when a relationship ends it is unrealistic to think you will still be able to have the same kind of friendship relationship with one another and not get things confused.

So, while I definately don't have all the answers, and of coarse to each "rule" there is always the exception (gay men and straight women or vise versa, or related men and women, etc)... It is my opinion that while men and women can definately be friendly, it is unlikely they will be able to maintain for any length of time a truly close plutonic friendship; without one or the other or both becoming romantically interested.