I asked a dear friend of mine "How do you know when you have tried all you can in a relationship?" and he said to me "You know a relationship is over when...nothing the other person could change about themselves would make you want to stay in the relationship."
I wonder how many of us tend to fall in love with a person's potential instead of the actual person. How often do we just overlook this and that, hoping that one day the person we are with, will miraculously become the person we actually want to be with?
To avoid falling into this trap I believe it's important to keep our hearts open so that we can see clearly, but to delay instant gratification when necessary. Have you ever heard of the saying "Good things come to those who wait"? I think it applies here and I am hoping it's true.
Besides, I wouldn't want to try to turn someone into something they are not, and delay their joy in expressing who they truly are.
1 comment:
I fall in love with potential all the time. ANd I have a tendency to get all infatuated with men that are unavailable (either by distance, emotionally, legally, etc.). I don't know what that's about. Maybe it is easier to like someone from afar, knowing that it won't work out and then I'll never get hurt. Playing the safety. Boo.
Back to potential. I know I change and I imagine that most other people change as well. In relation to a couple that had been married for many, many years, I heard from someone once (maybe this was from a movie) how do couples stay together for so long? The person responded, "we never fell out of love with one another at the same time" That makes sense to me.
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